To a friend

I am here if you want to talk at 2 am. I am here if you feel like you're overwhelmed by a sea of emotions. But that is also the problem. I am here, you are there.

I know we haven't exactly been the closest of friends for a long while now, but I still remember the awesome times we had together. We may be very different from each other, but I always know that I had a friend in you because we just hit it off since day one. All the hours we spent hogging the phone lines, all the times when you teased me (I suppose it was just to elicit a response), I still remember those.

We've done a lot of growing up. A whole lot that we've never fully realized. Time passed, we changed. We grew up.

During the time that passed when we were not in constant contact, I wondered if perhaps I'd been too distant. Perhaps I'd been unwilling to make the first move. Perhaps somehow we'd just moved on and drifted apart.

You crossed my mind last night. For a brief moment, I wondered if you were better. A short while later, you said you weren't feeling better. It wasn't easy to hear that you were struggling. I understand your struggles, I do, but is there something deeper to this? I can only help you with words of encouragement. I don't know if I can fully comfort you. I don't know if I can really help you, because I know that sometimes words just don't make it much better.

I'm sorry you feel this way. I wish there is something I can do to cheer you up. Where's the trigger happy friend I once knew?

I remember how you told me you saw me standing outside my classroom in kindergarten. I remember how funny it was when we discovered the magic of telecommunication at seven.

I miss you. I do hope you'll bounce back soon.